I agree with your assesment of the "Silver Ring Thing". It is not going to keep teenagers from having sex. The solution is to teach our children that sex is a sacred act. That it is a gift from God. That it is the ultimate way to express your spirtuality. That to really get the most out of sex, it should be done with respect, honor, and loving towards your partner. That when you treat sex with this kind of respect, it can bring renewal of your whole being, that it can help keep you stay healthy. And that it will provide your relationship with lifelong passion. It can enable men to see the goddess in women, and women to see the god in their men. The best way to teach this to children is to exercise sacred loving in your own relationship. The children who grow up in family that sets an example of sacred loving are amazing children.

I wonder aloud...can they slip off that pesky silver ring thing now and then to get down to some serious begating? The Book of Matthew has loads of begating. Quite frankly, I looooove begating. It's the most fun I can have without actually laughing out loud. Plus, it's good exercise and we are told to exercise more.

While the theocons contemplate the date of the flood, I found the date we around to some serious begating ourselves.

Annus Mirabilis by Philip Larkin

Sexual intercourse began
In nineteen sixty-three
(which was rather late for me) -
Between the end of the Chatterley ban
And the Beatles' first LP.

Up to then there'd only been
A sort of bargaining,
A wrangle for the ring,
A shame that started at sixteen
And spread to everything.

Then all at once the quarrel sank:
Everyone felt the same,
And every life became
A brilliant breaking of the bank,
A quite unlosable game.

So life was never better than
In nineteen sixty-three
(Though just too late for me) -
Between the end of the Chatterley ban
And the Beatles' first LP.

The abstinence only debate is silly all around. And while I can appreciate the sincerity of the first responder to Lizz's comments, I hardly think "showing our teens that sex is a sacred act" is the way to go. Hell, I can't get them to sit down long enough for dinner or take the garbage out. How am I going to show them sex being sacred? Sounds kinky. And one question: if I don't show them the sacredness of sex, does that make my kids "unamazing?"

Lookit, sex is like most new things that come about with puberty - like acne, it can be ugly and prevelant. We can tell our kids to ignore it and hope it goes away or we can talk about it frankly as an urge that may drive them crazy and maybe not but whatever sex does to them as teens, we know they can cope with it better if they use common sense in approaching it. Common sense dictates they will 1) not experiment with it until later; 2) try it with protection and a good dose of truthful education, or 3) try it without protection and lie to themselves and their parents who will go ballistic when they find out the kid is "doing it" and taking huge risks.

I went to that site and it seems like some of the craziest propaganda I've ever seen. I can't believe that we are going to twist or withhold facts from our teens because the thought of their sex lives makes us uncomfortable. We think we can brainwash them with light shows and slick packaging and that will make them forget how intrigued they are by the opposite sex! I think that there is nothing more "amazing" as a young person who owns their sexuality not through fear and intimidation, but through the knowledge of what sex truly can be. I think that that ring really symbolized the hypocrisy of our current society. I’d love to have one of those rings. I’d wear it while I was enjoying safe pre-marital sex with my fiancé after a night of drinking!

Hi-larious post! I forwarded it to several friends (via its link at the Huffington Post). Thanks, Lizz!

Coyne and others -

My comment about the kids who have been around parents who practice sacred loving was not meant as a knock on kids who have not been exposed to it. My apologies if that is what my comments projected.

I'm not saying that setting this example is all one needs to do to create a healthy attitude towards sex in your children, but it is a great start, and by the way, a great way to create excitement and growth in your relationship. Having frank discussions with your children about it is a must. Taking a common sense approach as you discuss is important as well. But children learn so much from example, and parents are one of the most important of those examples.

There is no need to invite your children into the bedroom to show them what sacred loving is all about. Sacred loving is a practice that goes way beyond sexual part of a relationship. It involves meditation practices, staring into one another's eyes, taking moments out of your everyday activities to acknowledge your love for each other. It involves showing each other great respect and using these practices to work through differences. The fallout of this practice can easily be seen by others even when you are not in the act of having sex. My wife and i get comments about how deeply in love we are all the time from people who have never been in our bedroom. Children will see this too.

If there is anyone out there that is interested in exploring sacred loving, just type "sacred loving tantra" into google. You will find many sites dealing with the subject.

I went to that site and it seems like some of the craziest propaganda I've ever seen. I can't believe that we are going to twist or withhold facts from our teens

Posted by: J. Woods
at May 23, 2005 02:05 PM

+++++

*i* cant believe we're PAYING FOR IT!!!!!!

The site is traveling at twice the speed of smell. It stunk up IE before it even finished loading.

There is so many things wrong with this "Silver Ring Thing" on so many levels, that a proven failure rate of 88% speaks volumes. AND, my head almost exploded when I read that taxpayers are footing the bill! OUTRAGEOUS!

I think you're underestimating the smarts behind the Dubya Administration's plan. Consider:

1. Millions are being spent on abstinence-only education.

2. Abstinence-only education has a failure rate of 88%.

3. Teens who have ONLY been given abstinence education are more likely to use NO birth control.

When you think about it, it's not stupid -- it's fiendishly smart: What better way to raise up some fresh cannon-fodder for their various "preventative" wars?

Ha, ha, ha... oh god.

I get it. If you want to teach your children that sex is sacred, then great. If you want your children to pledge abstinence, then great. BUT... make sure that you ALSO teach your children how to stay safe (both physically and emotionally) IF they decide to engage in sex.

It's just logical that if you love your kids, you'll go that extra mile, regardless of what you believe about sex. It's like battling freezer burn... wrap that chicken in some foil, and then double wrap it in a few of those zipper freezer bags just to be on the safe side. It isn't like you expect the tin foil to fail, you just want to make extra sure.

Oh... and I think tax payer dollars should be better spent in safe-sex-and-education programs. I wish parents would do it, but I don't have that much faith.

Silver ring thing sounds like something you buy at a sex shop...

It's the Abstinance Cirque de Soleil. Who has the contract to produce all these silver rings???

Received my silver ring. very nice. I use it as a cock ring.

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